Nylon smile lyrics - Portishead song

I'd like to laugh at what you said
but I just can't find a smile
I wonder why you can't
I struggle with myself
hoping I might change a little
hoping that I might be someone I wanna be

looking out I want to know someone might care
looking out I want a reason to be there
cause I don't know what I've done to deserve you
and I don't know what I'll do without you

looking out I want to know some way might clear
looking out I want a reason to repair
cause I don't know what I've done to deserve you
and I don't know what I'll do without you

I can't see nothing good
and nothing is so bad
I never had a chance
to explain exactly what I meant